glimpses

tel aviv

the wall

from the old cities

times

yes, there is a time for everything.
time to embrace and time to be apart
time to stay and time to go.

a time to wait.

Im thinking that Im in this time of waiting.
and also that Im in the right time.

time for me to be in finland.
I can feel it.
though I miss people and places,
but I know I need to be here now.

I have written to the marginal
of my Bible "time is a great refiner"
in the first letter of peter,
where it speaks about how
gold is refined, and so is our faith.
its funny how many times one
thinks that refiners have to be
something really hard and rough
(and well, many times they are)
but it took some time for me to
realize, that many times the
refiner in my life is just being still.
time.
waiting.
knowing that he is God.

david gave me a stone when I left israel.
such a prophetic stone it was :)
a small, smooth one.
and in his letter david wrote;
this stone is a stone I found in the south, Eilat.
it was, scientifics say, formed slowly.
because of the time it became a very firm and hard stone,
prepared for everything.
this is my methaphore of you.

jerusalem, my home

im flying tomorrow.

things Ill miss, to name a few,

the way nabil says shekel,
prayercall,
citylights by dark,
betlehem,
oren repeating tyttis name,
the men complementing in a nice way,
the dome of the rock,
the wall,
ruhama singing,
samirs stupid songs,
humus,
the old city,
getting lost,
ruut driving a car,
pauls jokes,
knowing where everything is in the kitchen,
the damascus gate,
sitting in munirs shop,
passing the checkpoint,
the men from our shop,
georges gentleness and humour,
david ross and her little sister,
the girls,
going on walks,
the bazaars,
losha doing pantomime,
arab music coming out of open windows,
david speaking with russian accent,
arabs and their coffee.

thankful mind and a heavy heart

we went to betlehem today.
did something illegal.
well, I dont know really.
just gave out christmas presents.
gospels of luke on tapes.
we liked it.

tomorrow is the last betlehemday.

today we had a farewell party by the youth.
it was amazing.
I think the nicest thing that has ever been done to me.
we had like an independenceday party at the same time.

they rolled the red carpet for me and tytti.
gave speeches, blessings upon blessings.

it is sad to leave these people and it gives me a heavy heart,
but still I know its time for finland now.

hall of names

we went to the holocaust museum today.

seeing the photos, hearing the stories
and shedding my tears I realized I wasnt
so much weeping for the losses,
but for the human soul.
for it being able to do such things.

and for the realization that it could be me,
raising my hand.

I can just humbly ask,
father, let me be one of the righteous among the nations.

as I was looking at the thousands of maps
with names of the victims
in the hall of names
again I had to admit:
who am I?
father, you are good and your love endures.
in the end you hold the scales of justice.

you know when sometimes its just hard to breathe?

we said bye to george today.
I guess this is a week of goodbyes.
though I wont settle for goodbyes, of course Im going to see these people still.

he took us to the doctors,
I got antibiotics.

"Im just having one last look"
he said,
looking at us two poor crying girls at the doctors office.

and then he went.

you know, its funny how the heart
easily recognises and gets attached to a brother.